How to Teach Your Child to Manage Strong Emotions

Kids have very strong emotions that can overpower them at times, making them feel scared, helpless, or out of control. As parents, we often bear the brunt of their behavior during these tough moments.

That’s why one of the most important things you can teach your child is coping skills—the strategies psychologists like me use to help kids handle difficult emotions and navigate challenging situations effectively. Whether it's dealing with the ice cream shop not having their favorite flavor or a classmate being unkind, coping skills help kids better manage daily stressors. And that makes parenting easier and more enjoyable—a win-win!

Why Coping Skills Are Essential for Kids

Helping your child learn to ride the wave of their emotions instead of being overwhelmed by them is one of the greatest gifts you can give. In this article, I’ll share three proven coping skills that can make a real difference the next time your child gets upset. The third one is something you can start doing today—so get ready for action!

1. Taking a Break

Has your child ever been so upset that they seemed like they had to scream, stomp, or even hit just to get those big emotions out?

While it may seem like expressing anger helps release it, research tells us otherwise. Studies show that punching something to "vent" actually increases anger and aggression—not decreases it.

So what’s a better alternative?

Encourage your child to take a break from the situation and use a calming strategy to regulate their emotions. This might look like:

• Deep breathing

• Listening to soothing music

• Visualizing a calming place (like their favorite beach or bedroom fort)

This isn't about suppressing emotions. It's about pausing to let those overwhelming feelings settle before responding. Once your child is calm, you can talk through what happened, validate their emotions, and help them identify and name what they were feeling—whether it was anger, sadness, or frustration. Over time, this builds emotional intelligence.

You can also brainstorm with your child about what they could do next time they feel that upset. For example:

"Tell me you feel like you're getting angry, and we can take a break together before going back to the activity."

A simple break can be incredibly powerful for calming the storm.

2. Create a Calming Corner

Coping skill number two pairs perfectly with taking a break: create a calming corner.

This is especially helpful if you're concerned that sending your child away to calm down might feel like punishment or rejection. A calming corner turns that break into something supportive and comforting.

You can set one up in any space—your child’s room, a quiet corner of the living room, or even with a portable box you bring out when needed.

Fill it with comforting and soothing items, such as:

• Fidget toys or stress balls

• A favorite blanket or soft stuffed animal

• Snacks or treats like mint gum or Tic Tacs

• Books, coloring supplies, or noise-canceling headphones

The calming corner is there for anytime your child needs to reset—especially when their emotions are just starting to rise.

Try saying something like:

“You seem like you're getting upset. Would this be a good time to enjoy some time in your calming corner?”

Let your child help pick what goes in it—this helps them feel ownership over their coping process. If you try it out, I’d love to hear what your child included! Pop a note in the comments and inspire other parents setting theirs up.

3. Focus on Preventative Measures

While in-the-moment coping skills are essential, there’s another piece of the puzzle that often gets overlooked: preventative emotional care.

These are the daily routines and habits that build up your child’s emotional resilience so that big emotions don’t hit quite so hard when they do come.

Let’s start with the biggest one: sleep.

Think about how you feel after a bad night’s sleep—more irritable, less patient, and not exactly your best self, right? It’s the same for kids. Sleep is critical for their mood, energy, and ability to regulate emotions. Making sure your child gets enough rest can significantly reduce meltdowns and outbursts.

(If you’re not sure how much sleep your child needs, check out my episode: [How To Find the Perfect Sleep Schedule for Children]—linked in the description.)

Other powerful preventative measures include:

• A healthy, balanced diet with snacks throughout the day to prevent dips in blood sugar and energy

• Daily opportunities for play and fun to release tension from structured activities like school

• Time outside—nature and fresh air are mood-boosters for kids and adults alike

• Offering choices and a sense of autonomy, so your child feels a sense of control in their day

Let them help decide what to wear, what snack to eat, or which book to read. These small moments of choice help reduce power struggles and increase emotional balance.

When you combine these preventative strategies with strong coping tools, your child is more likely to stay regulated—and when they do get upset, their coping skills will be more effective.

Final Thoughts

Take a moment to reflect:

• Could your child benefit from a short calming break now and then?

• Would a calming corner offer them comfort during big emotions?

• Are there daily habits—like sleep, food, or play—you could tweak to help them stay more emotionally balanced?

Coping skills aren’t just tools—they’re life skills. And when your child has a toolbox filled with ways to manage their feelings, not only do they thrive… but parenting becomes a whole lot easier, too.