Stop Repeating Yourself! 3 Listening Hacks

You’ve asked your child to do something over and over again, but it still doesn’t get done. Whether it’s putting their shoes away, tidying up their room, or starting homework, it feels like you have to repeat yourself constantly. You want to be a patient and positive parent, but you’re worried about losing your cool.

The good news? There are simple, effective ways to help your child listen the first time you ask—even if they have attention challenges. Today, I’m sharing three proven strategies that will help your child become what I like to call “first-time listeners.”

Why You Should Keep Reading

Wait until you hear tip number three—it completely changed things for me and my four kids!

1. Explain Your Perspective Clearly

One big reason kids don’t listen is that they don’t understand why the request matters to you.

What this looks like:

Imagine telling your child: “Please put your shoes away.” That might get ignored because it’s just another task in their busy day. But if you say:
“You may not realize this, but when you leave your shoes in the entryway, they block the door for the next person. That can be pretty irritating. I’d really appreciate it if you got in the habit of putting your shoes away in their cubby when you come home.”

You’re helping your child see your perspective, which makes them more likely to listen.

Why this works:

Kids don’t always see how their actions affect others. Explaining this connection builds positive relationships and cooperation.
Pro tip: Follow up with praise when they do listen, like:
“Oh, it was so easy to get into the closet today because you put your shoes away. Thank you!”
This positive feedback encourages them to keep it up (though they may still need gentle reminders).

2. Use Visual Reminders

Sometimes kids get overwhelmed by all the tasks in their day. You’ve had years to build your routines, but they’re still learning theirs. Visual reminders can help make your requests stick.

Examples:

• A note by the door saying: “Shoes go in the closet” or “Did you put your shoes away?”

• For cleaning a room, a simple checklist of 3 things: Toys, clothes, bed.

• For smaller messes, like scattered Legos, hand your child a Lego as a tactile and visual cue: “Thanks for cleaning these up!”

Why this helps:

Words can be forgotten quickly, but visual cues last longer and motivate kids to follow through.

3. Provide Transition Countdowns

Often kids don’t listen right away because they’re focused on something else and aren’t ready to switch gears. Being flexible and giving them a transition period makes your requests easier to follow.

How to do it:

• Give verbal countdowns: “Five minutes left,” then “One minute left.”

• Use visual timers like an hourglass or countdown timer on a phone.

• Apply this to transitions from playtime to cleanup or homework, and even leaving parks or playdates.

Why it works:

Countdowns prepare kids mentally for the change. But the key is to follow through consistently. If you say 5 minutes, stick to 5 minutes. Return for the 1-minute warning, then calmly ask them to move on.

When you do this reliably, kids learn to respect the transition time and respond faster.

Final Thoughts

Helping your child become a first-time listener isn’t about magic—it’s about clear communication, thoughtful reminders, and consistent transitions. These three strategies will not only reduce your frustration but also build a positive and respectful relationship with your child.